When Is The Right Bed Time?

Is the discipline of a child's bed time slowly going away? It would seem that way based on the questions I face most nights. Often, as I turn out the lights, my son asks why he must go to bed "early" when his friends all get to stay up. This is my second go-round with this type of questioning, having dealt with it with my older son when he was still in elementary school. Then, as now, I wonder if as a parent I have become too old fashioned or are other parents just being troublemakers by letting their kids stay up?

Public Domain Picture
Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

I remember having a bed time routine as a child. My routine started in the bathtub where I was allowed to play for a few minutes before having to soap up. I had two rubber sharks, each about six inches long. And while the theme from the movie "Jaws" was known for scaring people out of the water, I found it to be a soothing alternative to the quiet sound of being alone in a bathroom.

After my bath, and my half-hearted attempt to clean the tub, came time to get dressed and brush my teeth. Once my parents were satisfied that I had in fact applied enough fluoride, we would move to my room and to my favorite part of the night: story time. Even after I had grown too old to be read to I enjoyed using that time to read to myself or to imagine my own stories and adventures. What I did not enjoy was that moment when it came time to turn out the lights.

I admit there is a part of me that sympathizes with my son. His complaints bring back memories of that time when I thought "bed time" a dirty word. Now the kid who used to chafe under what I saw as unfair restrictions is the one in charge of enforcement. This task would be much easier if all those other parents would fall in line by putting their kids to bed on time. But even as I tuck him in I find myself wondering if his friends really are staying up late or is he exaggerating as I did as a child, telling my parents how my friends got to stay up. Good thing they never asked for names.

Could it be true that the other children get to stay up late? Are we moving towards a time when children no longer have a set time to go to bed? If you are a parent, do you still attempt to get your children in bed on time?

When Same-Sex Marriage Came to Town

{In light of last Friday’s Supreme Court marriage ruling, I thought I would repost what I Originally posted in 2013 on Fire and Hammer}

We made history! That is my home county made history when our Registrar of Wills started handing out marriage licenses to same-sex couples in violation of the state’s marriage laws. In doing so Montgomery County became the first in Pennsylvania to issue these licenses. Of course a court challenge was filed with the state hoping a judge will order the county to stop until a decision is made about the constitutionality of the law. {After I wrote this, the state’s ban on gay marriage was overturned.} What does this mean for the ministry of Christ in our area?

Up to this point I have not personally met a married same-sex couple. I have come across openly gay people, including the two mommies who brought their child to an event at the neighborhood elementary school. I also once watched a sister in Christ navigate a gay parent's arrival at a birthday party. While this mom made her preference evident, we all followed our host's lead treating the visitor like any other parent. I know these are the first of many times when I will have to respond to an openly gay person. With the recent actions of our registrar (and with the more recent court decision) I will eventually (now) have to decide how to respond when a same-sex couple wants to show me their wedding pictures.

There are churches that stand in support of same-sex marriage but most denominations still define marriage as the union between a man and a woman. The argument for or against same-sex marriage will continue but the bottom line is the church is above all called to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ. We are called to preach redemption and to deliver the message that Christ died for everyone. Are we ready to live out our faith even if doing so means loving the gay couple next door?

I believe it necessary to express a Biblical view of the meaning behind marriage. As our neighbors work to redefine the institution, each of us must pray for wisdom in how we should respond. Some believers are called to take a public stand for the true definition of marriage. All Christians will be called to share the faith. And while what has happened in my county {my country} may not have reached where you are today, most likely it is on the way. Pray that you and your church will be ready to continue in ministry; ready for that day when same-sex marriage comes to town.

God's Got Your Back

Daniel 1:9-16

On my old blog I wrote a lot about life as a codependent. Having a parent suffer with the disease of alcoholism had the effect of creating in me a very negative world view. The numerous arguments of my youth left me feeling that I always had to prove myself: that no one would ever believe me even if I were clearly telling the truth. The idea that I had someone in my corner was foreign to me. The instability of my home left me believing I had to fight the world on my own.

I bet Daniel felt like he had something to prove as the stability and freedom of his home were stolen from him. One day he woke up a citizen of Israel, only to find himself a captive of Babylon the next day. His new neighbors worked hard to replace his culture with theirs; to change him into a solid citizen of the kingdom. Daniel had already lost his home. Now he had to fight to maintain his identity and his faith in the face of a nation in which neither were tolerated.

On the issue of diet Daniel refused to give in, as many of those who were with him had already done. But how could he convince his captors not to force him to compromise? He could have argued his point, creating an antagonistic atmosphere. He could have insulted his "hosts'" food and culture. He could have tried to out talk his immediate supervisor, showing how wise he was when it comes to matters of diet. There are a number of things Daniel could have done in order to hold on to his diet and culture, but in the long run all he had to do was trust in God.

God worked to open doors for Daniel, beginning with having Daniel find favor with his immediate overseer. Because of their relationship, Daniel was able to ask not to have to defile himself with the king's food. He did not have to beg nor argue. He did not have to insult nor did he have to try to out maneuver. He simply asked and because of the groundwork laid by God his request was considered.

As followers of Jesus we do not need to trick or cajole others. We have nothing to prove and do not have to fear what will happen if our words are not received. When we trust in the Lord and follow his will, he will open the door to our success. And when the enemy comes to stand against us, true followers can rest knowing God has our backs.